A New Day

A lot has happened since my last post. A few days after I moved in, my feet started to swell, then my legs. After making sure it wasn't a blood clot, I was told it was fluid buildup, put on a water pill, and told to keep my legs elevated to try and drain the fluid.

Around this time I decided to get back on hospice. This time I have a great nurse.

I went downhill pretty quickly. I could barely walk, I was constantly in pain, I was throwing up whatever I ate, and my pulse kept shooting up so high I couldn't breathe. I was ready to give up, and I just wanted to go home to the Lord.

Then, a week ago, something happened to me. A fight rose up in me like I've never felt before, like a fire. It's like I woke up from a coma or something. I prayed to the Lord like never before, and I told Him I wanted to LIVE. I laid hands on my own body and commanded it to line up with God's word.

This cancer is NOT going to take me! I'm too young, and the Lord has work for me to do.

It's been an amazing week! I can already feel the difference in my body. I've been getting out of bed and walking down the hallway without any help! I'm bathing on my own too! I'm taking it day by day, kind of like physical therapy, and I will keep doing a little more each day.

I've got a joy now that I didn't have before. I'm going to walk out of this thing, and you all are going to witness a miracle. I'm going to live and preach and do exactly what the Lord commands. I'm so excited!

Three Months Later

Has it really been three months?

This summer has really flown by, and so much has happened in such a short time: cancer diagnosis, doctor visits, selling the house, and moving - it's really been a whirlwind. Thank God for His presence through it all!

This week I finally found a Primary Care Physician that I can start seeing on a regular basis. This doctor was absolutely wonderful. She is a Christian, she knows about this type of cancer, and she is very supportive. She talked to me as a person, instead of a cancer patient. She respects my decision regarding treatment, and wants to concentrate on the whole body, instead of just the cancer. I will be seeing her once a month, and she has already set up for me to get blood work done every 2 weeks.

After more than a week, I am finally getting settled in my new place. We closed on the sale of my house Thursday, exactly 1 week after we moved out. Things are finally starting to settle down, and I'm getting some time to just rest. I've done lots of sleeping the last few days. :)

When looking back over the last three months, and how much has changed since my diagnosis, I'm truly blown away. I have grown much, yet I know I've got a lot more growing to do. But I am willing to be molded in whatever way the Lord needs me.

Walking with cancer these past months has not been easy - I would be lying if I said it was. But there is such a strength in the Lord, and this has been so different from what I imagined it would be in the beginning. Now, I take life on a day-by-day basis. I make plans, but I rarely look past today, because I want to live in the now,  in this moment, always asking the Lord "What would You have me to do today?"

Saturday I will be speaking at the house of a friend, to give my testimony. She asked, and is opening her home, and of course I accepted. It's not everyday we Christians get opportunities to speak our hearts to people on such intimate terms as in someone's home. I cannot wait to see what the Lord is going to do!!

Diagnosis

On June 27th, just 2 short weeks ago, I was told I have cervical cancer. The "C" word. So ugly, cruel in its suggestiveness. The shock comes, along with the racing thoughts: "I'm too young." "How did this happen?"

And then come the tears, the despair, the hopelessness.

For me, though, those emotions only lasted a few moments. Quickly I got myself together and remembered, as if I could ever forget, that I have Jesus Christ living in me, as my Lord and Savior! He alone can see me through this and ultimately heal me.

And then came the peace. Sweet heavenly peace, like a warm blanket.

I am writing this blog to share my experience, my testimony, in hopes that it will help someone else who is going through this. A testimony is a powerful thing, and should be told as much as possible.

My journey has only just begun, but I want to share it as I go along.